While chatting online, a friend asked me about my stolen phone (taken from the ladies' toilet), and said, "that person who took it! may she get constipation!"
I responded:
may she have alternating days of diarrhoea and constipation!
My friend responded with laughter. I continued...
may she be stuck in the toilet with cramps, diarrhoea, heavy flow and NO TOILET PAPER!!!! and ... may she get rash on her face, where she touches my stolen phone!!!!
At which point my friend went, "Enough!". But I had to say one more thing:
may she have nightmares of my pointy stylus poking her eyeballs out!!! hearrgghgh!
Wow, hell hath no fury like a woman's wrath.. and it's true.
good thing it wasn't me. phew...